The truth is I feel ashamed of myself. Ashamed for not being as healthy as I would like to be. That's why I don't really like to talk about it. But it's also true now that I can't always hide it. It's got worse in the last few months.
So today I have decided to set aside the time to prepare for the next few gluten and casein free months. This means no bread, cakes, pasta or pizza. No milk, cheese or butter either. This means no taking a loaf of freshly baked bread from the oven with the edges crispy and the insanely beautiful smell of rosemary churning my stomach juices, sprinkling freshly ground sea salt on a thick cut slice, rubbing juicy fat garlic all over it and dunking it greedily in extra virgin olive oil. This is the image I find the hardest to give up.
I fear that people will stop loving me if I can't eat with them or like them.
Probably the worst thing is that like everything else in the natural healing world, there isn't much scientific proof that not eating bread will help my autoimmune symptoms. Most doctors of course think it's all crazy, faddish stuff. Still, there is new research coming out all the time to prove the thyroid-gluten connection. In any case, its not as much about science as it is about your faith in the power of food to both destroy and heal.
I am going to lose my faith in this plan time and again. I will sink my teeth into pizza and cake. But I will keep trying.
The first thing I have decided to make is Daniel Walker's World Famous Sandwich Bread. Daniel is a famous Paleo blogger and this recipe is from her blog Against All Grain. Daniel has also recently published her book by the same name. Paleo is all about eating absolutely no grains. It could be my next step but I hope gluten free will bring enough good change to allow me to carry on enjoying other grains. I am choosing to make this particular bread not only because of the rave reviews it has received globally but also because I naturally adore coconut products and most Paleo baking is heavy on coconut flour.
I warn you: this blog is generally meant to be a rant.
But I also intend to explore new ways of eating (as I always have) , recreate old flavours and listen to my body.
And nothing in the world can stop me from eating garlic and olive oil...or strawberry jam for that matter...
Just the old bread habits need to be broken.
World Famous Grain-Free Sandwich Bread, here I come!
